Source: The Internet

Road between Home and Centre for Group Cultivation

Love and sympathy are like sand and gold, although they are mixed together, I can still distinguish them very clearly. In Mathematics, the distance of the nearest two points is a straight line. However, it is always less clear cut in the art of living. Sometimes, there are some twisted variations between the two points which are comparatively harmonious and quite interesting; these include love, friendship, career, games and even some little living habits.

Just like the special habit that I have recently developed, every night at 10pm I drive home after finishing work at the clinic. Despite the fact that I am both mentally and physically exhausted and feel extremely dizzy, I still give up driving home via the shortest straight road. Rather, I drive towards the east and then take a turn to the west, leisurely touring the surrounding areas. Originally it takes 10 minutes to arrive home, I take half an hour instead. This is not because I avoid going home, but it is to allow the middle of the two extremes: the stressful workplace and the sweet home, to have a romantic curve and have a buffer space for the heart and soul. I specially travel to a lively night market, where I can appreciate the bright street lamps from my car, even to view the different styles and types of people, events, matters and to see the places where their lively activities occur. Curiously, I discover that some shops have closed and some shops have newly opened. No matter there are often traffic jams, I do not consider it a nuisance at all.

Following that, I drive past the Veterans General Hospital and the Nursing College, watching the ambulance, with its siren sound "Wu Yi", rushing at high speed and I even deliberately give way to it. I watch those graceful female students and nurses waiting for public buses, or those lovers on the road saying goodbye affectionately to each other, these make me recall the sweet memories of my youth.

Lastly, I make a further detour to the mountain road leading to Yangmingshan National Park. Along the road, I admire the beautiful mysterious night scene of Taipei and then travel back to the wonderful leafy boulevard. Being greeted by the trees on both sides of the road, I return home in a leisurely way.

As I sit in the car, I browse the colourful world outside the window, disappearing in a moment from the very corners of my eyes. Although I do not get out of the car to immerse myself in it, I still personally experience the relaxing and joyful atmosphere, similar to watching a Japanese Ukiyo-e realism film. This half an hour parade in the car, resolves the full 12-hour per day of depressed boredom and toil from the clinic. Actually, the two points between the workplace and home is not always a straight line, there should have a buffer point: just as divers surfacing from deep waters must similarly go through a procedure of decompression for safety. Only by this way, can it be unlikely that one will bring home the pressure of work and the feeling of tiredness.

Family is absolutely the safest and the most comfortable place in the world, it is not the place for you to offload your depression and frustration. The job to reduce pressure should be done before setting foot at the front door, similar to when you change into slippers as soon as you walk into the house. In our society, there are many people, whether man or woman, will be always asked or due to one's habits, desperately rush home as soon as they finish work. Every day, within the shortest distance of the line between the two points of work and family, they swing monotonously like the oscillation motion of a pendulum. Often, due to work pressure together with the fatigue of catching bus, as soon as arriving home, the place where personal feelings and behaviours are mostly accepted and tolerated, one fully vents out all the pressure and frustration accumulated during the day, dumping all the mental rubbish peremptorily all over our closest family members, and turns the home in pandemonium and utter confusion.

Going home is basically the happiest thing, but this ultimately makes people panic and flee to escape. On this point, Europeans and Americans understand better than us because they know how to moderate the conflict between work and family. After work men always go to a bar for drinks or a little bit of alcohol, they mix and mingle with the accustomed bartender to relax; whereas women shop around and buy things, or have coffee with friends and chat about family matters.

In fact, spending time like this isn’t much, yet it is very beneficial as it helps to alleviate pressure at work and to create a good mood when returning home. Of course, due to the difference between cultures and living habits, as well as the different conditions of the environmental hardware and software, it is impossible for us to behave in the same way as foreigners, who naturally go to bars after work to leisurely drink a few glasses of beer, coffee, or find someone to chat to. This is a regret. Thus, I treat this home-returning road as a special relaxation method. Actually one doesn't have to moan about traffic jams, nor does one have to hurry back:
•	Being able to be inside a concealed and comfortable personal space of a car, listening to soft and melodic music
•	Looking at the multiple facets of human behaviour outside the car window
•	Precipitating the disrupted emotions of the day and planning tomorrow's new ideas
Even travelling a bit more distance, and spending a bit more time, what loss can that be?

Even though the person waiting for you at home may have a very different opinion on the lateness of your return, however, when the person one welcomes is someone full of vigour and someone who expresses a delightful expression, wouldn’t one also feel the joy and happiness?  Don't be afraid of traffic jams, don't be frustrated with crowded public transport, just treat it as the compulsory practice that one must undergo to reach sweet home. Migrating birds have to fly over several thousand miles to return home, salmon have to swim against the current and jump over waterfalls to return home. With this point in mind, why are we still in a hurry!?  What troubles us!?

Postscript:
Rinpoche often tells me to have Buddhism merged into daily life. He further elaborates,
•	Another special method of relaxation is to arrive home, after resting or finishing meal, spare some time to read Buddhist sutras and to recite Buddhist sutras.
•	The Shrine or the Centre where fellow Buddhist followers practise group cultivation is most certainly the quietest place in the world. It is not the place where you vent your frustrations and lose your temper. The task of reducing work pressure should be completed before you set foot at the entrance.
•	Amongst our group cultivators, whether male or female, owing to various demands or personal habits, some always desperately rush home after work. Every day, within the shortest distance of the line between the two points of work and family, they swing monotonously like the oscillation motion of a pendulum. They do not know how to adjust the conflict between work and family. In fact, if one can spend a few more minutes in a car journey to visit a nearby shop which sells Buddhist books and have a browse around, even with the little time one spends, this will have enormous benefits, as it will alleviate the pressure from work and promote a good mood before going home. For those fellow Buddhists who live close to the Group Cultivation Centre, they can even visit the Centre to worship Buddha, to make an offering with incense and oil, and to share their experience and insight of Buddhist practice with other fellow cultivators…; as such, one can often, at the very least, maintain good thoughts in their mind. This enables one to increase a bit more chance of success, to be reborn in Buddha Land and in the Pure Land of one’s Yidam!
•	It has almost been 30 years (it is now the middle of 2014) since Rinpoche told me. The most obvious and basic principles look easy, but many disciples still cannot clearly see them or appreciate them. This is possibly due to their interests in Buddhist dharma, their enthusiasm in Buddhist practice and their development in wisdom, so regrettable, very regrettable indeed!  Eating meal at the same table, each cultivates individually!!  In the matter of Buddhist cultivation, it is more labour more reward!!!